What is ADHD

In simple terms, ADHD is a condition that affects executive functioning — the brain’s management system. These skills, located in the prefrontal cortex of the brain, include planning, focus, emotional regulation, memory, and impulse control. People with ADHD often have to work much harder to do what others seem to do naturally — getting up on time, sitting through a seder, managing a home, remembering appointments, or balancing responsibilities.

ADHD affects men and women, boys and girls, and it can look very different depending on the age or stage of life. A child might struggle to sit still or follow instructions. A teenager might feel overwhelmed in school or fall behind socially. An adult might constantly feel disorganised, emotionally drained, or unable to stay on top of life. It's not one-size-fits-all — and it often goes unnoticed for years.

ADHD in the Frum World

In yeshiva settings, ADHD is often misunderstood. A bochur might be labeled lazy or lacking motivation when, in reality, he’s struggling to stay engaged in long hours of learning without breaks or movement. He may want to do well, but constantly feels behind or frustrated with himself.

A man might show up late to Shacharis despite caring deeply about davening. Or a father might love his family dearly, yet find the routines and responsibilities of home life completely overwhelming. Meanwhile, women with ADHD are often underdiagnosed — especially if they did well in school, hyper-focused on their strengths, or were taught to “just try harder.” But ADHD can quietly chip away at confidence. The emotional and mental load of running a home, juggling children, and trying to keep things “together” can feel impossible — even when everyone else assumes she’s coping just fine.

Struggling to be ready for Shabbos on time, forgetting to daven or finding it hard to sit and learn isn't a lack of yiras Shomayim. These are often the result of executive functioning challenges — not poor values or weak motivation. With the right understanding and support, these spiritual and practical struggles can be approached with compassion and clarity.

ADHD Is Often Missed — or Misunderstood

Many people with ADHD don’t get diagnosed until adulthood — often after years of frustration, burnout, or being misdiagnosed with anxiety or depression. While these struggles are real and often connected, the core issue is sometimes missed: the way the brain is managing (or not managing) everyday life. Even without a formal diagnosis, if you:

• Constantly feel behind, scattered, or overwhelmed
• Struggle with planning, time, or memory
• Feel intense emotions or react quickly
• Procrastinate things you want to do
• Have been told to “just be more organised,” “stop being lazy,” or “work on your middos”

— there’s a good chance you’re dealing with something ADHD-related.

The Good News

ADHD doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means your brain is wired differently — and that’s something we can work with.

Through ADHD coaching, you can learn to understand your brain, build systems that actually work for you, and let go of the shame that’s been holding you back. Whether you're a bochur in yeshiva, a busy parent, a professional or someone just trying to stay on top of life — there is a way forward.